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10 Ways To live For Yourself

don't forget your worth. Stand for yourself. You matter

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Do you sometimes feel like you don’t love your life? Like, deep inside, something is missing? Like not living for yourself?

That’s because we are living someone else’s life. We allowed other people to influence or determine our choices—we are trying to please their expectations.

As you were probably told when you were in elementary school, “Just be yourself.” You can be a much happier person once you figure out who you truly are and when you learn how to be yourself.

If you are like most people, you have probably told yourself that things would be better if certain changes in your life or changes to yourself. You can make those positive changes yourself. Be proactive, and have a more positive outlook about yourself.

Below are 10 ways to learn how to be yourself and live more happily:

1. Don’t Aim to Please Others

There is a problem if you are never doing what you want to do, yet always doing what everyone else wants. This Is Why You Shouldn’t Please Others But Yourself.

Pleasing others can be a nice thing to do, but know where your boundaries are. Instead of always aiming to please others, you should do things for yourself now and then.

2. Don’t Worry About How Others View You

Occasionally thinking about how others view you may make you change for the good, but you should not be constantly wondering about what others are thinking. You should change if you want to, and change into what or who you want to change into.

3. Learn More About Yourself

Do you know who you really are? Ever since you were young, you have been conditioned to be one way or another. It may be weird just to spend a day being your spontaneous self, but sometimes it is the only way that you can learn how to be yourself.

4. Appreciate Who You Are

No matter how weird you are, appreciate yourself! Each person is unique, and everyone has at least a little weirdness in themselves. Appreciate your weirdness and let it out.

Don’t make the all too common mistake of waiting for someone else to create the week, month and year you want to have. That usually leads to much waiting and frustrations.

What to do instead:

Be proactive. Get the ball rolling yourself. Take action and take the first small step forward with making the changes you want to make to create the life you want to live.

  • Set up a coffee date or an evening at the pub with those most positive people in your life.
  • Have your low bar for happiness as you jump or drag yourself out of bed in the morning and go slow today.
  • Sit down tonight and write down those four most important things for you this year.

And if it feels difficult and you start to procrastinate then remember that you can always take smaller steps forward.

Do whatever is needed to reduce that mental barrier and to get yourself to begin or back into taking action again.

Living for yourself
Living for yourself

5. Be Confident with Who You Are

Do you ever doubt yourself? Doubting yourself can be very easy if you constantly compare yourself to others and wonder, “What if?”

Instead of doubting yourself all the time, you should be confident with yourself and who you are. Showing confidence in yourself and your decisions will also show others that you know what you are doing.

Comparing yourself to other people can easily become a destructive and depressing daily habit.

You compare relationships, cars, careers, bodies and houses and at the end of the day your self-esteem is low and you feel like a failure with negativity buzzing around in your head like a swarm of irritating bees.

What to do instead:

Compare yourself to yourself. Just see:

  • How much you have grown.
  • How far you have come.
  • The progress you have made towards your goals and dreams.

And don’t forget to celebrate the small successes and steps forward too.

This habit will help you to see yourself from a kinder and more helpful perspective where you feel energized as you appreciate the steps you have taken on your journey.

Instead of feeling drained and powerless to keep growing and to keep going for what you want out of life.

6. Forgive Yourself

Don’t think negative thoughts about yourself for taking wrong steps or making wrong decisions. This kind of thinking puts your focus on the problem and not the solution. It’s better to say good things about yourself than to say negative things. Always saying positive things about yourself is a sign that you have forgiven yourself.

7. Stop Overthinking

Do you look at everything as a glass half full or a glass half empty? It can be easy to be negative about yourself. However, when it comes to being happy, you must learn how to be yourself and be more positive.

Overthinking can make any issue seem bigger and scarier than it actually is. It can hold you back in life and from taking action.

What to do instead:

Set short time-limits for decisions.

For example: For small decisions like if should go and do the laundry, start writing a new article or work out I usually give myself 30 seconds or less to make a decision. 

8.Stop pushing away how you deep down feel.

It is one thing to focus on what is positive in life.

But it is another thing to try to push away how you deep down feel about something.

And it usually doesn’t lead to happiness even if you try to turn on a smile and force the positivity.

What to do instead:

Write it or talk it out.

Don’t force the positive thinking. If you have negative feelings or thoughts that pop up again and again then take some time with yourself to think it through.

A pen and paper or a journal on your computer can help you to think more clearly. Or you can talk about it with someone close to you.

Create a small plan.

After you have accepted and processed how you think and feel about this then write down a small plan – maybe just a step or a couple of them – that you can take action on to move yourself out of this situation and into something better.

And after that get going and get the ball rolling by taking the first small and practical step forward.

Living for yourself
Living for yourself

9. Learn from Your Mistakes

You can really learn more about yourself when you make a mistake. Mistakes in your life do not always need to be seen negatively. Instead, think about what went wrong, learn from it, and move on.

Spending too much time in the past usually leads to going over old mistakes or failures over and over again and wishing you could go back and do something about them.

And spending too much time thinking about the future usually leads to worries and building monsters and nightmare scenarios in your mind.

What to do instead:

Spend more of your time in the present moment. You’ll feel lighter, things will feel easier and you’ll be more alert to appreciate the small wonders of everyday life.

Reconnect with what’s happening right now by just sitting down and being still. Then either:

  • Just breathe. Spend a couple of minutes focusing on just your breaths going in and out.
  • Only focus on what is going on around you right now. Do it with all your senses. Listen, see, smell and feel what is happening in your little part of the world at this moment.

10. Strive for What You Want to Accomplish by Living For Yourself

Being yourself does not have to mean that you have to be stuck in status quote. Aim for what you want to achieve and strive for that accomplishment. You can improve yourself while still remaining true to yourself.

It won’t be easy. First, of course, you have your minimal free time and your responsibilities, kids to take care of, or you’re just traveling a lot. Still, you are your most important asset. And unless you are going to take responsibility for your happiness, no one else is going to. Furthermore, what do you want your kids to learn from you about life?

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